Take It All Away
by feelinwaytoodamngood
Summary: This is an AU inspired by the song "Blurry" by Puddle Of Mudd.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

_A/N: Based on Blurry by Puddle of Mudd._

Nikolas Cassadine sat in the middle of his living room. It was a shabby little house but he'd worked on it, making it a suitable place for his seven-year-old son to visit him. He had a swing set in the backyard along with a trampoline. A new Playstation was connected in the living room. He always let Jack win. Sometimes you had to believe that you could win.

He thought of Emily, his lovely ex-girlfriend. She was Jacks mother and the love of his life. One day she had just decided that she didn't want him anymore. She had loved him for almost half her life and it still hadn't mattered. She had taken him to court and won full custody of Jack. He got to visit his son. Of course everything was supervised and the visits were always brief.

He wanted to throw something. He wanted to yell, scream, and throw a tantrum because he was in so much pain. But he couldn't do that right now. Jack was due to visit him today and he would be damned if his son saw him this way. He would just have to wallow in his own misery some other day because his son took precedence over everything else.

Really he didn't hate Emily. Okay so he tried really hard not to hate her for Jacks sake. He buried his hatred and replaced it with a smile. Jack had enough problems to deal with. Automatically, he thought of Emily's useless waste of skin boyfriend, Jasper Jax. The man was a drunk and it grated on Nikolas nerves to think that after each visit he was sending his son home to live with a monster. Of course, if Jax ever hit Nikolas son, he would die. Jack always told the truth. Even Emily wouldn't be able to talk him out of it. Nikolas tried to show his son what was right and what was wrong.

Nikolas sat in his windowsill awaiting his sons arrival. He liked to watch from here, liked to see them before they could see him. It allowed him to watch Jax and see how he treated Nikolas son. Let that son of a bitch even raise his voice and he was a dead man. Nikolas would make sure of that. No one would hurt his son. He would protect him from anything and everyone. Hell, he lived with Emily. How much worse could the situation get for the poor kid?

He had thought about going back to court but he didn't want to confuse Jack. He needed the stability and the sense of home. Besides, Nikolas didn't have that kind of money and the custody battle could go for years. He should have married Emily he supposed, gotten himself some more rights to his son, but he couldn't overlook her many sordid affairs. Maybe he had been selfish in that.

Jonathan Jason Cassadine was his sons name. He was named after Emily's older brother. He was just a little kid and yet so much had happened to him. His parents had separated and he now lived with an asshole. Surely Nikolas was just paranoid. Emily wouldn't knowingly put Jack in harms way. She was a lot of things and one of those things was a mother.

A car door slammed and Nikolas jumped from his spot running for the door. He could see Jack running up the walkway, his dark brown eyes dancing and his smile unbreakable. Nikolas felt all worry and anger dissolve as he stared out at the little brunette. He held out his arms and Jack ran into them, a backpack of toys and games strapped to his shoulders.

"Daddy!" Jack shouted, his face red and his hair blowing in the breeze. Nikolas looked on to see Emily and Jax sitting in the car. They wouldn't come in. They would wait in the car.

Nikolas pushed past the bitterness and focused on his son. "Hey Jack. Ready to play?" he asked, brushing his hand over his son's hair. Let the bitch watch from the car.

"I missed you so much Daddy." Jack told him, not quite ready to let go.

"I missed you too. What do you want to do first?" Nikolas met his son's eyes. He was smiling, but there was something hidden. Was it fear? Was it sadness? Stop it, Nikolas.

"Trampoline." Jack replied.

"Lead the way, Little Man." They walked in through the gate and raced to trampoline.

"I beat you, Daddy!" Jack giggled. Nikolas grabbed him and threw him onto the trampoline carefully.

"I bet I can jump higher than you." Nikolas challenged.

"Nuh uh. I'm the king!" Jack argued.

"Is that right?" Nikolas took his son playfully by the arm and tickled his stomach.

"Cheater!" Jack howled and then launched himself onto Nikolas chest. Nikolas fell backwards and Jack gave him a big hug.

Nikolas smiled and pushed Jack off of him. For the next hour, they played on that trampoline until they were both dizzy.

"Games!" Jack decided and started to get off of the trampoline.

"Careful. You're a little too short." Nikolas reminded and jumped off first, helping his son get down.

"I'm going to be tall. Mr. Jax says so." Jack informed him.

"You don't have to call him Mr. Jax you know?" Nikolas assured him, letting the anger evaporate.

"Uh huh. He tells me that I have to respect him." Jack bit his lower lip in thought.

"How about those games?" Had to respect him! For what reason? The man was nothing to look up to. Stop it Nikolas. He couldn't seem to help it.

"Are you okay, Daddy?" Jack sounded worried. He took Nikolas's face in his hands and made him look at him.

"Just fine Champ." Nikolas promised. He was slipping. He had to stop it.

"Let's play a wrestling game. Mommy doesn't let me." Jack begged.

"Whatever you want." Nikolas smiled and picked Jack up with one arm, letting him hold on for dear life as he carried him inside.

"I won't bounce, Daddy. Don't drop me." Jack giggled.

"Not letting you go." Nikolas swore.

* * *

><p>"What is taking so goddamn long?" Jasper "Jax" Jacks demanded, the beer flying from his mouth. Really what did she see in this asshole? Had to be his money? Or had to have been, she corrected herself. He didn't have anything now.<p>

"He's visiting his father." Emily answered, closing her eyes and trying to dodge Jax's spittle.

"He's had long enough." Jax decided and grabbed the door handle.

"Jax don't." Emily ordered.

"Are you telling me what to do?" Jax doubted it.

"N-no." Emily answered. Just open another beer, she wanted to scream at him.

"I didn't think so." Jax grabbed the handle again but Emily grabbed his shirt collar. "Let me go, Emily." He warned.

"Jax, Nikolas doesn't get many visits with JJ." She was the only one who called him that.

"He's got a few more minutes. Then his time's up." Jax answered.

"Why do you even care?" Emily demanded.

"Because I've got some things to do today that's why. Things that don't include sitting outside some loser's house waiting for him to play with his kid!" Jax yelled at her.

"Don't raise your voice at me!" Emily folded her arms.

"Or what, Em? What are you going to do to me?" Jax wondered, moving closer to kiss her neck. He smelled like stale cigarettes and beer. She almost gagged.

"Don't tell me how to raise my son okay?" Emily met his eyes.

"I'm a member of this family now." Jax reminded her, catching the skin between her neck and ear.

"He's still JJ's father and...Jax I don't want to fight." Emily told him, shying away from his touch.

"Neither do I." He agreed and fell back against his seat.

Emily looked back at the house, wondering how long this would take.

* * *

><p>"Do you want to play on the jungle gym?" Nikolas wondered, running his hand over Jacks hair, intentionally messing it up. Jack swatted at him but smiled.<p>

"I'm too short though." Jack insisted.

"I'm sure we could work something out." Nikolas assured him.

"How 'bout fishing? I've never caught a fish." Jack looked up at Nikolas.

"There's a lake not too far from here. Climb on my shoulders and well go." Nikolas grabbed his house keys and locked the door behind him.

"Don't we have to tell Mommy?" Jack wondered.

"Her and Mr. Jax are probably busy. We aren't going far." Nikolas promised, hoping that for just a few minutes, he could have some time with his son.

"Well let's go catch some fish!" Jack exclaimed happily.

They fished for about fifteen minutes, and then skateboarded down the sidewalk. Emily noticed them coming and sat up. She hadn't realized that they had left. Damn Nikolas; he knew better. She hoped Jax hadn't noticed. It wasn't worth the fight.

"Can you push me really high?" Jack asked, looking at the swings and then back at Nikolas.

"Really, really high?" Nikolas smirked.

"To the moon." Jack answered. He walked over to the swing and sat down, his little hands holding on tight. Nikolas grabbed the back of the swing and pulled it back. He went under before letting go sending Jack high. The little boy screamed with delight.

Jax popped open his third beer of the afternoon and sipped it loudly. Emily laid her head on the steering wheel, impatient and ready to be home.

"Jack, I need to talk to you." Nikolas explained when he saw Jack wave at Emily. They were on the back porch enjoying a couple of root beer floats.

"Okay." Jack agreed, sitting next to Nikolas.

"You know that even though Mommy and I aren't together anymore...you know that it has nothing to do with you right?"

Nikolas often worried about how this whole thing was affecting his son. He would do anything to keep his son and that included going back to Emily. Jax was the only obstacle now. Well Jax and Nikolas's pride. It was hard to keep your head held high when your girlfriend was screwing everyone in town. He had often wondered if Jack was his and had had a paternity test done just to be certain. The boy looked too much like him anyway to belong to anyone else.

"I know that. Mommy tells me that all the time. She also says that Mr. Jax cant help the way he is. I wish he'd go away." Jack confided quietly.

Nikolas met Jack's eyes. "He's never hurt you, has he Jack?"

"No. He's not very nice to Mommy though and he's always yelling. If you got back with Mommy, he couldn't do that." Jack was getting too good at this guilt trip but Nikolas had heard it before.

"I'm worried about you." Nikolas argued.

"Don't worry. I know karate". Jack reminded with a giggle.

"You tired?" Nikolas asked him. Jack shook his head. "Well then let's go play." Nikolas picked him up and carried him inside upside down. Despite what Jack told him, the little boy was out in five minutes. He fell asleep on the couch next to Nikolas.

* * *

><p>"It's about damn time." Jax grumbled and Nikolas sent him a dangerous look as he helped a sleepy Jack into the car. Emily didn't seem to notice Nikolas or her sons presence. She looked upset but Nikolas didn't want to address it.<p>

"I love you." Nikolas bent down next to Jack and hugged him tightly.

"Can we get out of here please?" Jax smiled at Nikolas, his eyes taunting. Nikolas held himself steady.

"Just a second. I want to say bye to my daddy." Jack explained. "I love you too. See ya later dude." He did a thumbs up and Nikolas copied him.

"As cute as this is..." Jax began finishing up his beer and flicking a cigarette butt out the window.

"See ya later dude." Nikolas said to his son and then shut the door. Emily drove away and Jack watched him with sad eyes. The visits were never long enough and Jax needed to shut up before he got himself killed.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 1**

_A/N: Based on Blurry by Puddle of Mudd._

Nikolas Cassadine sat in the middle of his living room. It was a shabby little house but he'd worked on it, making it a suitable place for his seven-year-old son to visit him. He had a swing set in the backyard along with a trampoline. A new Playstation was connected in the living room. He always let Jack win. Sometimes you had to believe that you could win.

He thought of Emily, his lovely ex-girlfriend. She was Jacks mother and the love of his life. One day she had just decided that she didn't want him anymore. She had loved him for almost half her life and it still hadn't mattered. She had taken him to court and won full custody of Jack. He got to visit his son. Of course everything was supervised and the visits were always brief.

He wanted to throw something. He wanted to yell, scream, and throw a tantrum because he was in so much pain. But he couldn't do that right now. Jack was due to visit him today and he would be damned if his son saw him this way. He would just have to wallow in his own misery some other day because his son took precedence over everything else.

Really he didn't hate Emily. Okay so he tried really hard not to hate her for Jacks sake. He buried his hatred and replaced it with a smile. Jack had enough problems to deal with. Automatically, he thought of Emily's useless waste of skin boyfriend, Jasper Jax. The man was a drunk and it grated on Nikolas nerves to think that after each visit he was sending his son home to live with a monster. Of course, if Jax ever hit Nikolas son, he would die. Jack always told the truth. Even Emily wouldn't be able to talk him out of it. Nikolas tried to show his son what was right and what was wrong.

Nikolas sat in his windowsill awaiting his sons arrival. He liked to watch from here, liked to see them before they could see him. It allowed him to watch Jax and see how he treated Nikolas son. Let that son of a bitch even raise his voice and he was a dead man. Nikolas would make sure of that. No one would hurt his son. He would protect him from anything and everyone. Hell, he lived with Emily. How much worse could the situation get for the poor kid?

He had thought about going back to court but he didn't want to confuse Jack. He needed the stability and the sense of home. Besides, Nikolas didn't have that kind of money and the custody battle could go for years. He should have married Emily he supposed, gotten himself some more rights to his son, but he couldn't overlook her many sordid affairs. Maybe he had been selfish in that.

Jonathan Jason Cassadine was his sons name. He was named after Emily's older brother. He was just a little kid and yet so much had happened to him. His parents had separated and he now lived with an asshole. Surely Nikolas was just paranoid. Emily wouldn't knowingly put Jack in harms way. She was a lot of things and one of those things was a mother.

A car door slammed and Nikolas jumped from his spot running for the door. He could see Jack running up the walkway, his dark brown eyes dancing and his smile unbreakable. Nikolas felt all worry and anger dissolve as he stared out at the little brunette. He held out his arms and Jack ran into them, a backpack of toys and games strapped to his shoulders.

"Daddy!" Jack shouted, his face red and his hair blowing in the breeze. Nikolas looked on to see Emily and Jax sitting in the car. They wouldn't come in. They would wait in the car.

Nikolas pushed past the bitterness and focused on his son. "Hey Jack. Ready to play?" he asked, brushing his hand over his son's hair. Let the bitch watch from the car.

"I missed you so much Daddy." Jack told him, not quite ready to let go.

"I missed you too. What do you want to do first?" Nikolas met his son's eyes. He was smiling, but there was something hidden. Was it fear? Was it sadness? Stop it, Nikolas.

"Trampoline." Jack replied.

"Lead the way, Little Man." They walked in through the gate and raced to trampoline.

"I beat you, Daddy!" Jack giggled. Nikolas grabbed him and threw him onto the trampoline carefully.

"I bet I can jump higher than you." Nikolas challenged.

"Nuh uh. I'm the king!" Jack argued.

"Is that right?" Nikolas took his son playfully by the arm and tickled his stomach.

"Cheater!" Jack howled and then launched himself onto Nikolas chest. Nikolas fell backwards and Jack gave him a big hug.

Nikolas smiled and pushed Jack off of him. For the next hour, they played on that trampoline until they were both dizzy.

"Games!" Jack decided and started to get off of the trampoline.

"Careful. You're a little too short." Nikolas reminded and jumped off first, helping his son get down.

"I'm going to be tall. Mr. Jax says so." Jack informed him.

"You don't have to call him Mr. Jax you know?" Nikolas assured him, letting the anger evaporate.

"Uh huh. He tells me that I have to respect him." Jack bit his lower lip in thought.

"How about those games?" Had to respect him! For what reason? The man was nothing to look up to. Stop it Nikolas. He couldn't seem to help it.

"Are you okay, Daddy?" Jack sounded worried. He took Nikolas's face in his hands and made him look at him.

"Just fine Champ." Nikolas promised. He was slipping. He had to stop it.

"Let's play a wrestling game. Mommy doesn't let me." Jack begged.

"Whatever you want." Nikolas smiled and picked Jack up with one arm, letting him hold on for dear life as he carried him inside.

"I won't bounce, Daddy. Don't drop me." Jack giggled.

"Not letting you go." Nikolas swore.

* * *

><p>"What is taking so goddamn long?" Jasper "Jax" Jacks demanded, the beer flying from his mouth. Really what did she see in this asshole? Had to be his money? Or had to have been, she corrected herself. He didn't have anything now.<p>

"He's visiting his father." Emily answered, closing her eyes and trying to dodge Jax's spittle.

"He's had long enough." Jax decided and grabbed the door handle.

"Jax don't." Emily ordered.

"Are you telling me what to do?" Jax doubted it.

"N-no." Emily answered. Just open another beer, she wanted to scream at him.

"I didn't think so." Jax grabbed the handle again but Emily grabbed his shirt collar. "Let me go, Emily." He warned.

"Jax, Nikolas doesn't get many visits with JJ." She was the only one who called him that.

"He's got a few more minutes. Then his time's up." Jax answered.

"Why do you even care?" Emily demanded.

"Because I've got some things to do today that's why. Things that don't include sitting outside some loser's house waiting for him to play with his kid!" Jax yelled at her.

"Don't raise your voice at me!" Emily folded her arms.

"Or what, Em? What are you going to do to me?" Jax wondered, moving closer to kiss her neck. He smelled like stale cigarettes and beer. She almost gagged.

"Don't tell me how to raise my son okay?" Emily met his eyes.

"I'm a member of this family now." Jax reminded her, catching the skin between her neck and ear.

"He's still JJ's father and...Jax I don't want to fight." Emily told him, shying away from his touch.

"Neither do I." He agreed and fell back against his seat.

Emily looked back at the house, wondering how long this would take.

* * *

><p>"Do you want to play on the jungle gym?" Nikolas wondered, running his hand over Jacks hair, intentionally messing it up. Jack swatted at him but smiled.<p>

"I'm too short though." Jack insisted.

"I'm sure we could work something out." Nikolas assured him.

"How 'bout fishing? I've never caught a fish." Jack looked up at Nikolas.

"There's a lake not too far from here. Climb on my shoulders and well go." Nikolas grabbed his house keys and locked the door behind him.

"Don't we have to tell Mommy?" Jack wondered.

"Her and Mr. Jax are probably busy. We aren't going far." Nikolas promised, hoping that for just a few minutes, he could have some time with his son.

"Well let's go catch some fish!" Jack exclaimed happily.

They fished for about fifteen minutes, and then skateboarded down the sidewalk. Emily noticed them coming and sat up. She hadn't realized that they had left. Damn Nikolas; he knew better. She hoped Jax hadn't noticed. It wasn't worth the fight.

"Can you push me really high?" Jack asked, looking at the swings and then back at Nikolas.

"Really, really high?" Nikolas smirked.

"To the moon." Jack answered. He walked over to the swing and sat down, his little hands holding on tight. Nikolas grabbed the back of the swing and pulled it back. He went under before letting go sending Jack high. The little boy screamed with delight.

Jax popped open his third beer of the afternoon and sipped it loudly. Emily laid her head on the steering wheel, impatient and ready to be home.

"Jack, I need to talk to you." Nikolas explained when he saw Jack wave at Emily. They were on the back porch enjoying a couple of root beer floats.

"Okay." Jack agreed, sitting next to Nikolas.

"You know that even though Mommy and I aren't together anymore...you know that it has nothing to do with you right?"

Nikolas often worried about how this whole thing was affecting his son. He would do anything to keep his son and that included going back to Emily. Jax was the only obstacle now. Well Jax and Nikolas's pride. It was hard to keep your head held high when your girlfriend was screwing everyone in town. He had often wondered if Jack was his and had had a paternity test done just to be certain. The boy looked too much like him anyway to belong to anyone else.

"I know that. Mommy tells me that all the time. She also says that Mr. Jax cant help the way he is. I wish he'd go away." Jack confided quietly.

Nikolas met Jack's eyes. "He's never hurt you, has he Jack?"

"No. He's not very nice to Mommy though and he's always yelling. If you got back with Mommy, he couldn't do that." Jack was getting too good at this guilt trip but Nikolas had heard it before.

"I'm worried about you." Nikolas argued.

"Don't worry. I know karate". Jack reminded with a giggle.

"You tired?" Nikolas asked him. Jack shook his head. "Well then let's go play." Nikolas picked him up and carried him inside upside down. Despite what Jack told him, the little boy was out in five minutes. He fell asleep on the couch next to Nikolas.

* * *

><p>"It's about damn time." Jax grumbled and Nikolas sent him a dangerous look as he helped a sleepy Jack into the car. Emily didn't seem to notice Nikolas or her sons presence. She looked upset but Nikolas didn't want to address it.<p>

"I love you." Nikolas bent down next to Jack and hugged him tightly.

"Can we get out of here please?" Jax smiled at Nikolas, his eyes taunting. Nikolas held himself steady.

"Just a second. I want to say bye to my daddy." Jack explained. "I love you too. See ya later dude." He did a thumbs up and Nikolas copied him.

"As cute as this is..." Jax began finishing up his beer and flicking a cigarette butt out the window.

"See ya later dude." Nikolas said to his son and then shut the door. Emily drove away and Jack watched him with sad eyes. The visits were never long enough and Jax needed to shut up before he got himself killed.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Emily Bowen looked around her house and sighed. It was a mess. Someone should clean it up. Jax liked it clean. Not that she cared what he liked. He could take a flying leap for all she cared. He had helped her get Jack though and for that she felt indebted. _He was a beautiful man_, she thought to herself. Once he had had money, thus the basis of his appeal.

She figured he could be funny if he was drunk enough. Her eyes closed when she remembered how bad it had been last night. Thankfully she had convinced Jack to go and stay at a friend's house. She pulled back her sleeve and realized that it was indeed bruised and probably scarred. It didn't matter. She couldn't let Jack see it. She didn't want him to be scared. Who was she kidding? She didn't want him to tell Nikolas.

She had never felt so trapped in her entire life. Damned no matter what she did. If she left Jax, he would find her and Jack. If she didn't, what would happen? Today it was just a bruise. And what if he went after Jack next? Would she protect him with her life? Well of course she would. This was her son! That meant something. Protect him with her life, she vowed silently.

The back door opened and Emily jumped. He was home early. She pushed her sleeve back so that the bruise was covered and welcomed him at the door, giving him a hug. He pushed away from her and went straight for the refrigerator.

"What the hell is this?" Jax demanded, flinging a gingerbread house from the top shelf and watching it crumple.

"Jack's Christmas project...or it was." Emily answered, knowing that she would have to pick this up too.

"What's it doing in here?" Jax was already mad at her and it wasn't even seven o'clock.

"Are you serious?" Emily met his stare. "I don't want to fight. Ill clean it up. Go read your paper or something." Emily gestured toward the living room.

"I don't take orders from you last time I checked." Jax reminded.

"Mommy, look what—" Jack skipped into the kitchen and stopped at the sight of his ruined gingerbread house.

"Why did you come in here like that? We can hear you, Jack. You don't have to shout." Emily scolded, sweeping up the mess.

"My...my..." He cast his eyes downward.

"It shouldn't have been in front of my beer, you know that." Jax explained without remorse.

"Your stupid beer!" Jack screamed and ran to his room. Jax looked like he might go after him, but Emily grabbed him by the arm.

"Let him alone. We need to talk." Emily assured him.

"What is it this time, Emily?" Jax wondered, his voice low and challenging.

"Fine. Forget it. I didn't say anything." Emily scooped the pieces of gingerbread into the dustpan and then dumped it in the trashcan.

"I'm sorry. What were you going to say?" Jax apologized. He grabbed her by the shoulder and she flinched. "Are you afraid of me now?" Jax sounded more pissed off than actually hurt.

"After what you did last night, why wouldn't I be a little afraid?" Emily's voice rose and she pulled herself out of his grasp.

"You asked for that." Jax defended.

"Oh yeah? Then why not hit me again? Go ahead Jax, if it makes you feel more like a man!" Emily folded her arms.

"You think hitting you makes me feel like a man?" He smirked. "There are plenty of other things I could do to you."

"I feel like every time Jack leaves, I'm sending him home to be abused." Nikolas explained to Courtney. They were sitting at the dinner table, lasagna in front of them, but neither was eating.

"You can't think of it that way, Nikolas. The courts wouldn't have given Jack to Emily if they thought her an unfit mother." Courtney stroked his cheek.

"Not even for all of Jax's money?" Nikolas challenged.

"Why don't we kidnap him? We can take him with us to like Canada or something and then change our names? Is that what you want me to say?" Courtney met his eyes.

"I don't know what I want you to say." He looked down at his untouched food.

"Let's do something else. Hey, maybe when Jack comes back next time, we can take him on the boat." Courtney suggested.

"Supervised visits." Nikolas said through clenched teeth.

"Were you supervised this time?" Courtney wondered.

"Today wasn't an official visit. They sort of sprung it on me last night. I don't think the courts knew." Nikolas grumbled.

"So Emily, out of the goodness of her heart, just brought Jack over? I don't buy it." Courtney took a drink of her iced tea and then set the glass down.

"Maybe he begged her to."

"When's the next visit anyway?"

"Next Thursday. She's dropping him off here. I doubt the officer will forget."

"Should I be here, or do you think it's too soon for me to meet him?"

"I don't think it would be a good idea. He's confused enough as it is." Nikolas took his plate to the sink.

"I wont confuse him, but don't you think he needs to know who I am?" Courtney stood up and followed him.

"Yes, in time, but not right now."

"So I'm just your dirty little secret then? Does Emily even know about us?" Courtney's mouth was set in a tight line.

"I don't talk to Emily." Nikolas didn't like where this was heading.

"Nice excuse." Courtney smashed a plate against the counter.

"Courtney." Nikolas touched her arm but she moved away from him.

"I should go. I'd hate to break up your little family". Courtney snapped, grabbing her bag and a few clothes.

"Don't do this. You don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh so I'm stupid now?"

"Did I say that? No. Don't blow everything out of proportion."

"I just want to meet your son and you act like I'm asking for the moon."

"I won't put my son through anything else. I don't want him to get scared and think that we're going to just abandon him."

"You mean you don't want him to think you and Emily are over." Courtney corrected.

"Court," Nikolas ran his finger over her lips not sure what he could say to convince her that she was the one he wanted. The phone rang. He ignored it.

"Go ahead. It's probably Emily begging you to spend the night in her bed. I'm out of here." Courtney ran out of the house and slammed the door behind her.

"Son of a bitch!" Nikolas knocked the phone onto the floor.

"Daddy? Daddy, are you there?" Jack's voice screamed from the phone. Nikolas stumbled to the phone and snatched it up.

"Jack, I'm here. What's up buddy?" Nikolas tried to keep himself calm.

"Daddy, mommy isn't moving. She got hurt. Please come." Jack begged him.

"I'll be right there." Nikolas promised.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"Courtney, I need to see you." Nikolas said into the phone when she answered her cell. "Look I know you're mad at me, but it's about Jack."

"Is he all right?" Courtney cared and she wasn't going to pretend otherwise.

"He called me in a panic, said Emily was unconscious. I'm at the hospital with him now. Emily's in the ER. I need you." He added with a sigh.

"I might scare Jack, remember?"

"None of that matters, Courtney."

"Do you think that makes everything okay?" she challenged, clutching the phone. He could hear the tears in her voice.

"No and we'll talk about this but not right now. Right now I need you here with me. I can't leave him."

"Of cour...course not. I'm coming." Courtney gave in and hung up.

* * *

><p>"Is mommy going to wake up?" Jack asked Nikolas when he came to sit down in the waiting room. He had watched him on the phone but known better than to eavesdrop.<p>

"Of course she is. Don't you even worry about that." Nikolas ran his hand over Jack's hair, messing it up. Jack couldn't even force a smile.

"I should have protected her." Jack whispered, looking down at his shoes.

"Jack, look at me. Look at me." Nikolas ordered softly. "This is not your fault. Mommy got hurt, but you couldn't have stopped it."

"But why not? It's not like you were there to save her. I have to do that now." Jack jumped up from his seat and walked to Emily's room, knowing that he couldn't go in.

Nikolas was frozen for a second, but then got up as well and made his way to his son. "You want to be mad at me? That's okay." Nikolas assured him. He bent down to his level. "She is going to wake up, I promise you."

"How do you know that?" Jack insisted. "You aren't God." Fresh tears flew from his eyes.

"Jack..." Nikolas tried, but his son turned his back to him.

"I got here as soon as I could." Courtney announced, stopping in front of them. Jack stared at her a little surprised.

"Jack, say hello to Courtney." Nikolas knew the timing was horrible but Courtney was right; it was past time for them to meet.

"No!" Jack threw himself in the floor and cried.

"Jack, get up." Nikolas laid his hand on Jack's back but his little boy shied away from him.

"I don't want to meet anyone! I want Mommy! I want Mommy!" Jack's body shook as he cried. He couldn't catch his breath and he began to cough.

"Nikolas." Courtney nodded toward a chair and Nikolas walked over there with her.

"I don't know what I am supposed to say. He hates me." Nikolas decided. They kept their voices soft so Jack wouldn't hear them. At the moment he was laying in the floor on his back, the sobs still taking over.

"He does not hate you. He's just scared. You want to blame someone, blame Emily for doing this to your son." Courtney took his hand carefully, knowing it was still very sore.

"I know he did this to her." Nikolas mumbled, not referring to Jack at all.

"Nikolas." Courtney wanted to tell him that he was wrong.

"Tell me you're not thinking the same thing." Nikolas challenged.

"We have to hear it from Emily." Courtney said instead.

"If she wakes up." Nikolas argued.

"She's going to wake up!" Jack stood there and both Courtney and Nikolas looked up. They hadn't even noticed him. "She is!"

"You're right Jack. She is." Courtney agreed with a smile. "You know what? Waiting around can get kind of boring and I thought maybe you'd like to color. What do you think?" She opened her purse and showed him the coloring book and fresh box of crayons she had brought.

"You're a stranger." Jack pointed out.

"Hi Jack. I'm Courtney. See? Now were friends." Courtney set the book and crayons on the floor.

Nikolas watched both of them curiously, a smile of all things playing on his lips.

"I guess it couldn't hurt. Besides, they'd be sad if I didn't use them."

Courtney smiled at Jack. Nikolas pulled her onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her. Jack opened the coloring book, the pages making a crinkling noise, and got to work.

"Where's my sister?" Jason Morgan demanded, coming up to Nikolas.

"Lower your voice." Nikolas warned, getting up out of his chair. Courtney bent down next to Jack, never having met this man.

"Where is my sister?" Jason repeated, his anger about to boil over.

"Uncle Jase!" Jack attacked his leg and Jason was momentarily distracted.

"Hey Jack. Long time no see." Jason calmed himself down immediately, giving Nikolas a look. Nikolas crossed his arms, daring Jason to make a scene in front of Jack.

"Lila, come back here!" Sam McCall-Morgan ran after her eighteen month old daughter, her hair whipping against her face.

Jason reached out and managed to snag a piece of Lila's sleeve and picked her up. Sam was out of breath as she approached them. She found a smile and tickled her baby daughter.

"She got away from me. We stopped for a balloon and then she took off." Sam explained. Sam met Courtney's eyes. "I'm Samantha Morgan and you are?"

"Courtney Matthews." They shook hands.

"Nikolas, I need to talk to you." Jason urged, not wanting to upset the children or Sam.

"All right. Jack, Uncle Jase and I will be right over there okay? Stay here with Aunt Sam and Courtney." Nikolas and Jason walked away. Sam took Lila and sat her on the floor next to Jack.

"Now Lila, this is important. Pay attention." Jack demonstrated, coloring a little heart in his coloring book. "You have to stay in the lines."

Lila took the crayon and put it in her mouth, biting into it and breaking it in half. She handed it back to him and at his expression, she giggled. Jack shrugged and put the crayon back in the box.

Sam and Courtney sat down in the waiting room chairs. " Are you and Nikolas together?" Sam asked, deciding that if she couldn't eavesdrop on Jason's conversation then she'd have to make do with Courtney Matthews. Really she didn't have anything against her; she just didn't know her.

"Together yes. In love yes. I'd ask about you and Jason but that ring sort of makes it obvious."

"Almost two years."

Courtney gave her a look, noticing that Lila was probably a year and a half since she was walking and maybe even talking.

"We got married just after Lila was born."

"She's beautiful."

"She looks like Sonny." Sam acknowledged and then shut her mouth. She hadn't meant to say that.

"Sonny? My brother Sonny Corinthos?" Courtney hadn't talked to him in probably five years. She has just moved in with Nikolas about a month ago. Her and her brother had never been that close but she couldn't believe he didn't tell her about having a daughter!

"Yes. He's Lila biological father." She paused. "Courtney Matthews not Corbin?"

"Same dad but Sonny changed his name and I took my mother's last name." Courtney explained.

"Sonny didn't mention a sister but he always told me that he had family all over Port Charles. I just assumed he meant children." Sam and Courtney shared a quiet laugh.

"How many children does my brother have now? I know Michael and Morgan." Courtney had really missed a lot, but truth be told she had only been here for a year and Sonny hadn't exactly welcomed her with open arms.

"Well he had a daughter Kristina with Alexis Davis."

"Had?" Courtney was confused.

"She was kidnapped."

"Did he get her back?" Courtney demanded.

Sam shook her head.

"I know you don't love my sister. I've come to terms with that, but..." Jason shook a warning finger at Nikolas. "How dare you not keep Jax away from her."

"Excuse me?" Nikolas stared hard at Jason incredulously. "I would have stayed for my son and Emily knew it. That's why she stole him from me, so that I could never get away from her."

"Don't you talk about her that way! She's lying in a hospital bed right now."

"I'm not the one who put her there."

Emily woke up in an unfamiliar bed and forced her eyes to open. Jax sat beside her, holding her hand. "Nikolas?" she called out, her voice catching.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

"Nikolas?" Dr. Monica Quartermaine walked over to him and Courtney. They stood, hands intertwined. Jack and Lila were asleep in the chair between them. Sam had somehow convinced Jason to go with her to get coffee.

"How is she?" Nikolas demanded an evil part of his mind wishing she was dead. He discarded the idea as soon as he thought it but he couldn't pretend he cared about her. When he found himself worrying about her it was only because she had Jack and whatever touched her touched him as well.

"She's awake and asking for you, Nikolas," Monica told him before walking away. Courtney looked surprised but didn't say anything. She just turned, let go of Nikolas's hand, and went to watch the children.

"I'll be right here." Courtney promised, her smile not quite reaching her eyes.

Nikolas walked into Emily's room and stood in the doorway. He didn't announce his presence right away, a part of him wanting to watch Emily with anger-filled eyes. She had put Jack in Jax's hands, left him vulnerable, and he couldn't find it in him to forgive her.

"I'm so glad you—" Emily began but Nikolas cut her off.

"Why are you asking for me?" he wondered, folding his arms.

"Not even going to ask how I'm feeling?" She looked hurt.

"I can ask the doctors that now answer the question."

"I wanted to talk to you about Jax."

"Let's talk about him then. Let's talk about how he beats you. Or how you refuse to leave him even though he puts our son's life and your own in constant danger." Nikolas spit out the words as if they left a bad taste in his mouth.

"I never meant to…" She swallowed and then met his eyes. "Jax didn't do this to me."

"Didn't do what? Monica never explained the situation to me."

Emily pulled the sleeve of her hospital gown back and held out her left arm for inspection. Nikolas walked closer and almost laid his hand on her arm before catching himself. From her wrist to halfway down her arm was dark red slashes. "I didn't want to hurt anymore."

"So you cut yourself?" Nikolas accused. He didn't like caring about her, but he found himself worried.

"I must have passed out from the blood loss." Emily explained.

"You left our son alone with Jax while you cut yourself. What if you'd hit the right vein? What if you'd killed yourself?"

"So what?"

"So you're a mother and even if your life is total shit right now, you should act like one!"

"They're going to take Jack away from me." Emily sobbed.

"Why shouldn't they?"

Emily stared at him coldly. "So that's it? I'm a bad mother and deserve to lose my son? You don't even care that—"

"You never thought of Jack. When that blade found your arm, you were thinking of your own pain."

"That's enough!" Jason ran in and walked over to Emily. She had, by now, pushed the sleeve back into place. He turned and stared at Nikolas. "Who the hell do you think you are?"

"Jack's father." Nikolas gritted his teeth together.

"Jason, it's okay."

"No it's not. He can't just come in here and yell at you." He turned to Nikolas. "You can leave now."

"Jason, you don't understand. There are some things you don't know." Emily tried to explain.

"That's okay Emily. I'll leave you alone with your brother, but this isn't over. After everything you've done, what goes around comes around." Nikolas stated and then walked out.

"Son of a bitch." Jason looked toward the door, but Emily laid her hand on his wrist.

"No Jason. It's not worth it."

"He threatened you!"

Sam saw Nikolas storm out of Emily's hospital room and deduced that Jason was inside. She set the four foam coffee cups on the side table next to Courtney and walked inside. Jason was fuming and she immediately walked over to him and rested her head on his shoulder. He wasn't startled by her presence, seemed to have known she was there all along. He turned and wrapped her in his arms, his eyes focused on his injured sister. The idea of Jax physically hurting Emily sent chills down her spine. And Jack? Had he ever been a victim of one of Jax's attacks? Surely if they'd had known it was this bad, they would never have left Emily and Jack with Jax but she put on a good show and she and Jason had bought it. Sam felt stupid and she knew it didn't sit well with Jason at all.

"Am I interrupting anything?" she wondered, her eyes falling on Jason and then Emily. "Not that I have any intention of leaving," she quietly added.

"No. Sam it's good to see you." Emily found a watery smile for her sister-in-law.

"Emily, how could you not tell us how bad this whole thing was?" Sam demanded and Jason's arms tightened around her.

"There wasn't a way to." Emily looked guilty.

"You're the victim here Emily."

"Actually, that's in question." Monica announced from the doorway. They all turned to face her.

"What are you talking about?" Sam wanted to know, her hands resting on Jason's arms.

"Emily's injuries are self-inflicted. We were able to make this conclusion based on the way the knife was positioned." Monica calmly explained.

"Knife? You mean she did this herself?" Sam met Emily's eyes.

"You need to check your results again Monica. Emily was the victim here. She's not stupid. "Jason defended his baby sister, never realizing just how wrong he was.

"They're very definite, Jason. Emily cut her arm up and almost hit a very vital vein. Were you aiming for that one?" Monica hated to ask but the precision of the cut made her question her daughter's motives.

"You're shaking." Courtney noticed, running to where Nikolas stood. He had one hand on the soda machine and one running over his face. She didn't practice caution when approaching him because there wasn't a reason for her to be afraid of him. She knew he could never hurt her. She noticed it in the way he talked to her and touched her. Besides, they both knew she could take him.

"I'm fine." Nikolas grumbled. Courtney hugged him and he felt some of his resolve break apart.

"You look like hell." Courtney mused, patting his back. "How's Emily?" It was hard for her to ask this because she hated that woman even though she had never met her. She knew her only through what Nikolas told her. She was always there after Emily took Jack home so she always had to see Nikolas hurting. For all she cared, Emily could be dead. She thought of Jack and relented her last thought. He was going through so much. He shouldn't have to lose his mother too even if she was an unfeeling bitch.

Nikolas didn't reply right away, choosing his words carefully. He couldn't think of one nice thing to say though. Courtney backed away and Nikolas's eyes found hers. She kept her arms wrapped around his waist and had to look up because he was a little bit taller than she was.

"Has anyone seen Jax?" Courtney inquired, realizing that it was time to change the subject. She could almost see steam coming out of Nikolas's ears.

"No. He didn't do anything to Emily, not this time at least."

"WHAT?" Courtney shouted and then chided herself. Neither Lila nor Jack stirred.

"She slit her wrist. There are slashes all down her arm." Nikolas could still see the creamy skin broken and sliced. He had to blink a few times before the image finally left his mind.

"Did she say why?" Courtney demanded incredulously.

"She told me she didn't want to feel anymore pain." Nikolas breathed, the image still haunting him.

"What does she know of pain?" Courtney spat. "You're the one who has to say goodbye to your son. You're the one who cries when he goes. You're the one who has to fight to see him because the courts sided with that bitch for some reason." Nikolas had never told her why they had done this, but then she had never asked. Emily and Nikolas had been broken up for most of Jack's life but Nikolas and Courtney had only been dating for about a year. If he didn't feel comfortable discussing it with her now, maybe someday he would. She didn't want to push him.

"Daddy?" Jack rolled over onto the floor. Courtney and Nikolas hurried to him but he was so dazed he didn't think to cry. "Why am I on the floor?"

"You were sleeping on the chair and turned the wrong way." Nikolas explained.

"Is mommy awake?" Jack asked.

Courtney looked over at Nikolas and then back at Jack. "She is."

"Can I go see her please?" Jack begged, getting to his feet. His eyes pleaded with Nikolas's and bargained with Courtney's.

"I don't know if that's such a good," Nikolas began but Jason cut him off.

"Of course you can. She's asking for you." Jason ushered his nephew into the room. He addressed Nikolas once Jack was out of sight. "She is still his mother even if you've given up on her."

"Did you hear what she fucking did?" Nikolas challenged.

"She's afraid and alone. If Id known how bad it was...don't think you know her. You don't know shit." Jason turned and headed toward his sisters room.

"Are you okay Mommy?" Jack whispered standing at the end of her bed. She looked very white to him, very pale and ghostlike. He didn't like it. Her hair was lifeless and her eyes were filled with tears.

"Oh Champ I'm fine. You did the right thing, calling your dad. I'm very proud of you." Emily smiled even though it appeared fake to Jack. He didn't call her on it.

"I couldn't find Mr. Jax and Daddy always says that if something happens…" Jack began to ramble.

"You did a good job."

"What happened? Why did you go to sleep?"

"I cut myself when I was dicing tomatoes for dinner. That's all." Emily lied, not wanting to tell her son that she had tried to kill herself.

"But you weren't cooking anything. There wasn't a pan out or a cutting board." Jack recalled.

"How can you know that? You were stunned."

"I pay attention." Jack replied simply. He did and that was what made Emily uneasy. He never forgot anything.

"Your mom is pretty tired. How about we let her rest?" Sam suggested standing behind Jack. Jason had gone to get Lila. Visiting hours were far from over but Monica had bent the rules for them. Nikolas wanted to take Jack home but Jason would hear none of it so, to avoid confusion, they had agreed that he would spend the night with them.

"Are you really tired Mommy because I can stay? Grandma will let me.?" Jack assured Emily, reluctant to leave her alone.

"I am Buddy. Why don't you go with Uncle Jase and Aunt Sam and they'll bring you to see me tomorrow?" Emily told him. Jack hugged her tightly. Emily used only one arm to hug him with since her other one had been bandaged a few minutes prior to his visit.

"Come on Little Man." Sam urged, knowing how hard this whole thing was for Jack to understand. He took her hand and let her lead him out. He kept sneaking glances at Emily until they reached the hallway. He dropped Sam's hand and ran to Nikolas.

"Daddy!" Jack hugged him tightly and cried on his shoulder.

"It's okay." Nikolas promised rubbing his son's back.

"Mommy looks so sad. I don't want to leave but she said that I have to." Jack mumbled into Nikolas shoulder.

"That's right. You're going to help Uncle Jason and Aunt Sam with Lila and then come back in the morning." Nikolas replied calmly.

"Can you come too?" Jack wondered.

"No, but I'll see you in the morning too okay?" Nikolas bargained.

"Okay." Jack agreed and Nikolas handed him to Sam. Jason held a sleeping Lila in his arms. The couple walked out.

"I can't sleep without my mommy." Jack explained to Sam as she got him settled in the guest room. Jason was tucking Lila in across the hall and they had decided that it might be easier for Jack if Sam put him to sleep.

"Well, why don't you tell me what your mom does when she puts you to sleep?" Sam suggested.

"She runs her hand over my head and tells me the squirrel story." Jack replied.

"The squirrel story? You know that one too?" Sam had no idea what the squirrel story was but maybe she could improvise. "Did you know about the squirrels' cousin, er, Harry?"

"Nope never heard of him. Are you sure were talking about the same squirrel?" Jack asked her.

"Well his cousin's story hasn't been heard by a lot of people. Would you like me to tell you what it's about?"

"Okay."

"Now Harry was a very unusual squirrel."

"Why?"

"Well he was a big, fat ball of fir basically. The other squirrels used to tease him."

"You mean like Rudolph?"

Sam looked up. "Rudolph?"

"The reindeer." Jack clarified.

Yes, just like that. Except he couldn't fly. I'm getting off subject." Sam realized.

"So what happened to Harry?"

"He became the first squirrel solo artist." Sam answered. Jack gave her a look. "I'm not kidding. He was always singing on the treetops, in the branches, and keeping the neighbor owls and squirrels awake at night. They kicked him out so he took his little squirrel suitcase and hit the road, following the road to success."

"Have I heard any of his songs?"

"Well there is that one song with a bunch of hamsters." Sam hoped he didn't ask her what it was called.

"Harry the squirrel went on tour with the Hamsters?" Jack sat up, excited.

"Hey, I'm only finishing this story if you lay down. Deal?"

"All right."

"Harry had problems with stealing the nuts and berries and sooner or later, the Hamsters kicked him out. That's why he's not on any of the posters. However, if you look outside when you're playing, sometimes you can still hear him singing. According to the newspapers, he's moving here."

"To Port Charles? Can we go see him?"

"We'll have to sneak past the press." Sam explained.

"What kind of bedtime story is this?" Jason asked from the doorway, smiling.

"You can't come into the story toward the end and expect to understand it." Sam scolded playfully. "It's getting kind of late, kiddo. How about I finish tomorrow night?"

"You mean I can't go home tomorrow?"

"Oh um…" Sam looked at Jason.

"Let's just wait and see." Jason said to Jack, walking over to the bed. Him and Sam tucked in Jack and Sam kissed his forehead.

"Sleep tight, Jack Attack." Sam whispered.

"Sweet Dreams, Aunt Sam. Night Uncle Jase."


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

There was a knock at the door and Jason went to answer it. Sam, Jack, and Lila were at the park and this allowed Jason to finish up some important work he had been putting off. He also wanted to go see his sister today and prove that either Jax or Nikolas had something to do with her accident.

When he opened the door, he found Jax on the other side, looking like he didn't have a care in the world. Jason resisted the urge to grab the man and put a gun to his head, knowing that some kind of abuse went on. Still he couldn't prove it.

"What the hell do you want?" Jason demanded.

"I've come to visit my future stepson. Is he around?"

"No. And you stay away from my nephew."

"I don't think so. I have lawyers that say I have a right to see him."

Jason grabbed Jax by the shirt collar and whispered, "And I have .38 Special that says you wont."

"What is going on?" Sam demanded, as her and the kids walked up. "What are you doing here Jax?"

"I came to see Jack. Hey Jack-O." Jax waved to Jack.

"I want to see my daddy. Not him." Jack told Sam.

"Don't worry, Jack Attack. He was just leaving. Jason picked up Jack and led Sam, who had Lila in her arms, into the penthouse. "Feel free to lose this address." He told Jax before closing the door behind them.

"Jack, why don't you go play upstairs with Lila so Uncle Jase and I can talk?"

"Actually talking or fighting?"

"Talking." Jason answered.

"All right. Come on Lila." Jack grabbed her hand and they went upstairs.

"What was Jax doing here?"

"He wanted to see Jack."

"Why? He doesn't even like Jack."

"I think it's about power more than anything."

"Well he can leave all of us out of it. I don't want that little boy hurt, Jason."

Jason rounded the couch and walked over to where Sam was standing. "I know. I don't want anything to happen either and nothings going to." He hugged Sam tightly to him. "I don't want you to worry."

"Sorry. That comes with the territory when it involves my family."

"You know I love you, don't you?" Jason asked, lifting her chin with his thumb so that she met his eyes.

"Yes." Sam nodded.

"I don't know the whole story when it comes to Jack. I got a couple of guys to do some digging but so far Jax is clean and Nikolas is innocent."

"I know you're worried about your sister Jason, but I don't think she's the victim in all of this."

"Of course she is."

"Jason, she cut her own wrist. No one forced her to do that."

"So she says. It could be a cover.

"Jason, I'm worried too, but we can't just assume…"

"My sister is my business, Sam." Jason let go of her and walked out of the penthouse.

Sam stomped after him, flinging open the door. "You don't get to just walk out."

"Sam—"

"No. You stay in here and talk this out with me like an adult!" Sam demanded.

"I don't want Jack to hear us fighting. That's all his parents ever did, and I'm sure that's all Jax and Emily ever do." Jason explained.

All the fight left Sam as she considered this. "I know you hate to be wrong, Jason, but what if you really are this time?" Sam challenged.

"Then God help us all." Jason told her.

"Nurse?" Emily called, noticing that her arm was beginning to heal. "Nurse!"

"I'm here. Do you need something?" Jax wondered, walking into the room.

"Go away, Jax."

"Since when do I take orders from you, Emily?"

"Since my brother will pop you full of holes when I tell him what you've been doing to me."

"You wont be telling your brother anything."

"What are you going to do?"

"You know, you're pretty unstable Emily. Why, I wouldn't be surprised if you tried to kill yourself again and succeeded." He mused.

"You wont come near me."

"I could always go after Jack this time."

"You will stay away from my son."

"Wouldn't it be a shame if something were to happen to that nice little boy?" Jax sneered.

"I can promise that nothing will." Nikolas announced sticking a gun to Jax's back.

"Are you going to do something with that, Cassadine? Because I can promise, the moment you pull that trigger, your son will never be with you again."

"I don't plan on their being any witnesses."

"Nikolas! Put the gun down!" Courtney demanded.

"Get out of here, Courtney." Nikolas ordered.

"Yeah this isn't any of your business." Emily added.

"Shut the fuck up Emily." Courtney spat.

"Nikolas, are you going to let her talk to me that way?"

"My concern has nothing to do with you, Emily. You've put our son in danger."

"That's not fair!"

"Is it fair for Jack?"

"Enough." Nikolas shouted. "Courtney, I'm handling this. Emily, shut up."

Emily watched him with a horrified expression on her face and Courtney tried really hard not to smile at her astonishment. "Nikolas, give me the gun." Courtney urged him.

"He threatened to go after Jack." Nikolas explained.

"Oh well in that case," Courtney pulled a gun out of her purse.

"Where did you get that?" Nikolas demanded.

"Well that's kind of an interesting story." Courtney mumbled.

"Courtney?" Nikolas pressed her.

"Okay so it's not real. What of it?" Courtney folded her arms and glared at Emily's smile. "But it ways a ton and I could still knock you out with it."

"Are you going to kill me or what?" Jax wondered.

"You can count on it." Nikolas whispered, dropping his hand to the side and handing Courtney the gun to put in her purse. They walked out.

"Hi Sonny!" Lila toddled down the stairs when she noticed her daddy letting Sonny in.

"Hi Lila." Sonny smiled, opening his arms so she could hug him. She ran to him and he hugged her tightly.

"Looks like someone's got a fan." Sam walked into the living room, watching Lila hug Sonny and her heart squeezing just a bit.

"What'cha doing today?" Lila asked Sonny.

"I need to talk to your daddy."

"You have dimples like me." Lila noticed.

"Yeah well only we cool people get dimples." Sonny explained.

"Lila, let's let Daddy and Sonny talk." Sam suggested.

"All right Mommy. Bye Sonny!" Lila waved, walking upstairs with Sam.

"What's going on?" Jason asked once his family was out of sight.

"I wanted to know how your sister was doing."

"She'll live. Speaking of which, have you been by to see your sister?"

"Not yet."

"Jasper Jacks is beginning to make me nervous." Jason muttered. "I don't want him around my sister or my nephew."

"Why not just take care of him then?" Sonny inquired.

"Two reasons. One: my sister would never forgive me. Two: I'd be the most obvious suspect."

"We could send Francis."

"I just keep waiting for Nikolas to knock him off.

"Aunt Sam?" Jack called, looking up from his Legos. Sam, who was putting a puzzle together, met his eyes.

"What is it, Jack?"

"When will I get to go home?" he asked.

"Don't you like it here, Jack?"

"Sure I do but I miss my mommy and my daddy."

"Well of course you do. How about we call your daddy right now and you two can hang out?"

"Actually, that would be a bad idea." Jason interrupted, stepping into the room.

"Why? He just wants to see his parents."

"Jack isn't leaving the penthouse." Jason stated.

"Did something happen, Uncle Jase?"

"Jason, what is it? Tell me. She urged, pushing on his shoulders.

"Jack, your mommy died today. Jason announced.

"What?" Jack whimpered.

"What?" Sam repeated.

"I just got the call from your daddy."

"She's just sleeping." Jack countered desperately.

"No Jack." Jason whispered.

"How?" Sam murmured.

"Not right now, Sam." Jason argued.

"I want to know!" Jack screamed.

"Jack, honey it's okay." Sam promised, patting his back. "It's going to be okay."

"No it's not!" Jack cried. "No it's not! I want my mommy! I want my mommy!"

Jason pulled the little boy into his arms and let him cry, picking him up and rocking him. "It's going to get better Jack." Jason promised, not allowing himself to cry.

"How do you want to handle this?" Sonny asked Jason later that night after Sam and the kids were sleeping.

"I'm taking him out."

"You're too emotional. Let one of the guards do it."

"No, Sonny. I have to avenge my sister."

"Don't get caught." Sonny muttered.

"After I'm done with him, they won't be able to identify the body." Jason swore.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"Nikolas? Are you in here?" Courtney knocked on Nikolas's door. She hadn't seen him since he was asked to identify the body fourteen hours ago. "Open the door, please." She begged him, unlocking the door. "Nikolas?" she called again, stepping inside.

"I'm in here." Nikolas assured her from the kitchen. He had a shoebox sitting on the table and there were pictures spread out around it. He, himself, was standing against the counter.

"What's going on?" Courtney wanted to know, stopping in the doorway.

"Sam asked me to find a picture of Emily to use for the service." Nikolas explained, nodding toward the box.

"Why did she ask you? I mean, wouldn't Jax have one?"

"They can't find Jax."

"He's probably the one that killed her."

"I've been looking through these all morning and I can't find the right one."

"Just find one of her smiling. She did smile didn't she? I know this isn't easy for you." She walked over to him and laid her hand on his arm.

"I just don't like what this is doing to Jack. Emily had her faults, but she was his mother and he loved her."

"You loved her too."

"At one time, maybe I did." Nikolas snapped defensively. "It really doesn't matter now. She's dead."

"Nikolas, do you want to talk about this?" Courtney offered. "Because we can."

"No. I just want to find a picture."

"Sam told me that Jason left last night and she hasn't seen him since."

"He's gone after Jax. I hope he finds him and guts him like a pig."

"Because of what he did to Jack or because of what he did to Emily?"

Nikolas met her stare. "What do you want me to say Courtney? What?"

"Nikolas..."

"No! You tell me what you want me to say and I'll say it! Just tell me what I have to do to make everything better for you!" Nikolas spat.

"Why are you acting like this?" Courtney retorted.

"What do I have to say to make it all okay, huh? For you? For my son? What the hell am I supposed to say? To do? Tell me, Courtney!"

"Stop it!"

"No, you stop it! I'm not Superman. I can't make anything better for anyone do you understand? I can't turn off what feelings I might have had for the mother of my child. I'm sorry if that makes me weak but I can't." Nikolas stormed out of the kitchen.

"Nikolas, wait!" Courtney ran after him.

"Stay away from me right now, Courtney." Nikolas warned.

"No! I already told you I'm not going anywhere and I meant it!" Courtney reminded him.

"What do you want from me? Any of you?" Nikolas asked her. "How can I make it easier?"

"You can't! You have to feel just like the rest of us!"

"Emily's dead! She's dead! I didn't hate her and I can't pretend I did! We made a son together! And now she's dead and he's hurting. I haven't even been to see him yet. I can't face him. How the hell am I supposed to tell him that I couldn't save his mother?"

"You weren't supposed to save her."

"I've always been able to save her. Ever since we were kids. I wasn't anticipating Jasper Jacks."

"Everything that happened to her she made happen. No one forced her to let Jax move in with her and your son."

Nikolas stopped halfway up the stairs and reached out for the railing. "I'm not going to service. Find a picture." He ordered, before continuing up the stairs.

"Nikolas." Courtney whispered, cringing when the bedroom door slammed shut.

*****

"Jack? Can you come out please?" Sam urged, knocking on Lila's bedroom door where her and Jason had moved the kids.

"No! Go away! I want Mommy!" Jack shrieked.

"Honey, it's almost time for the funeral." Sam explained.

"There's no funeral 'cause she's not dead!" Jack insisted with a cry.

"Jack, please." Sam leaned against the door.

"I said no!"

"What's the matter with Jack?" Lila wanted to know, coming up behind Sam.

Sam jumped and turned to her little daughter. "He's lost his mommy and he's very sad."

"If he lost her then when can find her right, Mommy?" Lila asked.

"No baby. His mommy's dead."

"She's not dead!" Jack argued.

"Jack, open the door." Sam repeated.

"No!"

"Jonathan Jason Cassadine, you open this door now!" Lila ordered.

The door opened and Jack peered out at his cousin. "Big mouth for a little girl." Jack stated wryly.

"I'm a big girl." Lila countered, planting her hands on her hips.

*****

"Jason, I'm so sorry about Emily." Carly told him as they stood in the hall that separated their penthouses.

"Thank you Carly." Jason replied. His shirt and jeans were wrinkled leading her to believe he had slept in them. This couldn't be easy for him. His hair was tousled and his bright blue eyes were dark and almost nonexistent when he stared at her. There were circles under his eyes and his hands, she noticed, were shaking.

"It's no lie that we didn't care for each other." Carly confessed. "But I hate to see you hurting." She reached for Jason and stepped toward him, resting her hands over his.

"I'll see you at the funeral." Jason promised, heading for the elevator, letting go of Carly's hands and turning his back to her. She decided he just didn't want her to see him cry which she had only seen one other time, the night Sam had almost died with Lila.

"Jason? What else is going on?" Carly wondered. She didn't like how foggy his gaze was or the emotionless tone of his voice when he spoke to her. Was it guilt that he held for not being able to save Emily from Jax? Logically, there wasn't anything he could have done to save his sister.

"Nothing that you need to worry about." Jason sent her a half-smile and then his face was impassive again. Carly wasn't sure what she could do for him other than be around when he decided to fall apart. Whatever was wrong, he hadn't shared it with Sam, Carly realized. Otherwise he wouldn't look so defeated right now.

"Have you found Jax yet?"

"Not yet."

He probably left town after killing Emily." Swallowing hard, she asked, "Jason, how did Emily die? You never told me."

"She was stabbed." Jason explained. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

_"Jason, what's going on?" Sam murmured as Jason shut the door behind him, closing the distance between them._

_"Shh." He nodded toward the stairs where both Lila and Jack had fallen asleep._

_"Did something happen?" She sighed when he kissed her._

Sam blinked and the memory faded but the fear remained. That night had been absolutely incredible: she'd never felt so close to Jason. On the other hand, he had been hiding something from her and she had pushed him until he finally told her.

_"I went to see Emily." Jason explained, as he and Sam lay upstairs in their bed. He softly stroked Sam's hair as they lay there breathing hard. They had never made love that way: so intense, so desperate._

_"Is she alright?" Sam inquired, resting her hands over Jason's, noticing that they were shaking. She had asked the question knowing that, if Jason's dark eyes were anything to go by, tragedy had again struck._

_"No." Jason replied, kissing Sam and pulling her closer as the kiss quickly intensified._

_"You're scaring me." Sam admitted, breaking the contact. "Tell me what happened." She rested her chin in her hand as she looked down at him._

_"She's dead." Jason breathed, barely able to say the words as his throat closed up, pinching the bridge of his nose as tears fell down his cheeks._

_Having never seen Jason cry, Sam let Jason lay in her lap and ran her fingers through his hair. "How did it happen? She held back tears as Jason's entire body shook with sobs. Sam leaned down and kissed Jason's hair, squeezing her eyes shut._

_"She was stabbed."_

_"Stabbed?" Sam repeated, the world around her twirling round and round as if she was sitting on spinning top._

_"I killed her." Jason said in a harsh whisper._

Sam swallowed back a few sobs as she sat in the pew with Jason, never once hearing the priest as he talked about how wonderful Emily had been. How wonderful had she actually been though? She had gotten engaged to a dangerous drunk and exposed her child to him. She then kept her child away from his father as often as she could. She had no real respect for her son: she had always treated him like an inconvenience. And now she was dead, killed by her older brother.

_"What do you mean you **killed** her?"_

_"I went to talk to her about giving Jack to Nikolas because it was obvious to everyone involved that Jax was just going to hurt him or both of them sooner or later and I didn't want my nephew exposed to that kind of life." Jason continued his voice distant._

_"And she fought you?" Sam guessed patting Jason's back as she watched him battle his emotions long enough to finish the story._

_"With everything she had. She got out of the bed and told me that Jack would never live with Nikolas. She told me that Jack was her child and she would never let Courtney or any other woman raise him. She started hitting me and I tried to restrain her. She started crying out in frustration and I told her that I didn't trust Jax and I couldn't believe she would put herself ahead of her son. That's when I walked toward the door. My pocketknife fell out of my back pocket and Emily reached for it before I could retrieve it." Jason stopped there, unable to continue at that moment. It was all too much for him. He hadn't meant for Emily to get hurt. He had only wanted to save her and Jack._

_"Why did she go for the knife?" Sam queried, realizing that Emily must have been mad. She had never really respected that woman after seeing what she had done to herself and Jack. Her nephew was traumatized as all hell thanks to Emily's poor choices. She had never once thought of him. She had tried to end her own life, had tried to leave Jack alone with Jax._

_"She flipped it open and said that Jack would never be with Nikolas and that I needed to mind my own business. I should have walked out then, Sam. Why didn't I?" He shouted, more tears falling from his eyes._

_"You wanted to save her." Sam assured him. "But you couldn't." She added sympathetically._

_"I should have." Jason argued._

_"The moment she grabbed that knife, she ended her own life." Sam countered._

_"I should have been more careful. I shouldn't have tried to get it away from her. You know, when I reached for the knife and we struggled, she told me that I should take her side because she was my baby sister and blood should count for something." Jason remembered._

_Bitch, Sam thought faintly. "It did count. You were trying to get her out of that life." Sam replied emphatically._

_"Instead I brought her into mine where I was more of a danger to herself than Jasper Jacks." Jason muttered bitterly._

_"Jason, stop it."_

_"She had her back to me and I heard her quick intake of breath as my knife slid between her shoulder blades. I pulled it out and screamed for a nurse, a doctor, but they weren't fast enough. It made this horrible noise as it hit the ground. I pulled Emily into my arms and she looked up at me and whispered, 'How could you do this to me?' That's when she died." He climbed off of the bed so that he could put some distance between them._

_"It was an accident." Sam assured him, staying where she was._

_"I should have been more careful!" Jason snapped._

_"Jason, you can't blame yourself. You didn't set out to hurt her!" Sam reminded him._

_"But I did anyway, didn't I?" He turned toward her, his eyes angry and his mouth set in a tight line._

Emily's death had easily been blamed on Jasper Jacks and Sam hadn't been in any hurry to turn Jason in. He had tried to save Emily but she had been lost long before that night, Sam told herself. Neither Jason nor Sam had told anyone about that night, about Jason's confession and they never would.

Jason's guilt had been what pushed him to make sure that Nikolas got custody of Jack. He had given up his rights and convinced the courts that Nikolas was what Jack needed after all of the ugliness he had already seen in his young life.

Courtney held Nikolas's hand tightly as they sat with Jack in-between them. Nikolas had told her that Jack would be theirs, that Jason and Alexis had set the whole thing into motion. 

* * *

><p>"Courtney? You're shaking." Nikolas noticed, running toward her as she stepped out of her car. It was raining pretty heavily and Courtney stood there watching Nikolas, barely seeing him.<p>

"Nikolas." She murmured against his neck as he led her into their hotel room. It was only temporary until this whole thing with Jack was settled and put to rest. They weren't leaving without his son.

"Why were you standing in the rain?" Nikolas wondered, pulling off his jacket and wrapping it around Courtney, taking her hands in his and blowing on the trying to warm her up.

"Is it raining?" Courtney asked faintly.

"Yes sweetheart. What were you doing in the rain?" Nikolas repeated.

"You look good." Courtney noted, fixing his tie. Emily's funeral was in about an hour and she needed to get ready.

"Courtney, what happened?" Nikolas urged, feeling her shake in his arms as he held her close.

"Jax didn't kill Emily." Courtney assured him, looking up into his confused brown eyes.

"How do you know?" Nikolas didn't like the certainty he saw in Courtney's eyes or how she seemed to be pulling into herself. "You can tell me." He whispered against her hair.

"Because he died before she did." Courtney replied, letting her legs go out under her. She fell to the ground and Nikolas followed her down, rocking her slowly.

"What do you mean?"

"I shot him." Her voice never wavered as she set the facts straight.

"You what?"

"I shot him." She looked away guiltily. "He cornered me outside the clinic."

"What clinic?"

"I had an appointment. The doctor told me that I was pregnant, that I am pregnant. Jax found me and followed me to my car. He told me that he would custody of Jack and then come after our baby." Courtney's eyes filled with tears as she continued. This wasn't how she had wanted to tell Nikolas. She was three months along and she only been trying to protect herself.

"You're pregnant?" Nikolas whispered, lifting her chin with his thumb.

"Yeah. Three months. Or should I say twelve weeks?" Courtney rambled.

"Why did you shoot Jax?" Nikolas wondered.

"I had the gun in my purse for safety. I took it out and showed it to him. I told him that I knew how to use it, that you had taken me to shooting ranges. I warned him, Nikolas. He just kept coming. I pulled the trigger." She nodded and then her eyes misted. Thanks to those many lessons, she had known just where to shoot to cause the most damage. She had shot him in the head.

"Where's the gun, Courtney?"

"In the harbor. I threw it in and drove here." Courtney explained. "I'm so scared, Nikolas."

There's nothing to be scared of now." Nikolas promised. "I'm going to take care of you and our children. Forever and for always. How does that sound?"

"He would have hurt me or the baby." Courtney assured him.

"But you didn't let him and I'm so proud of you, baby. So proud." Nikolas answered, cradling her head in his hands.

*****

They had planned on telling Jack about the baby after the funeral, around the same time they told him that he would be coming to live with them. They were moving in together and Nikolas and Courtney were planning to get married in June, giving them almost seven months to plan it.

Emily's killer was never caught. Neither Sam nor Jason ever told anyone else. Nikolas brought Jack to see Jason, Sam, and Lila all the time and Courtney made sure that their daughter, Lisa, knew her Uncle Sonny, Aunt Carly, and all of her cousins. Sam delivered twins nine months after the funeral and Nikolas and Courtney got their dream wedding with Jack as the ring bearer. They gave him a ring of his own so that he was a big part of the wedding. The priest asked him if he thought that his dad and Courtney should get married and he just smiled and said, "Yes."

Jax's body was dumped in the harbor and no one ever found it. Neither Courtney nor Nikolas ever admitted to knowing what had happened to the heartless bastard. Emily's body was buried in the family plot and Jason visited her often to tell her about how happy Jack was. Little by little, the guilt faded and he allowed himself to be happy with Sam, Lila, and their twins, Anna and Rachel.

**THE END**


End file.
